i saw a stranger whose face was screwed up in confusion of the moment, whose hands were finding a purpose in that moment, whose lips quivered in the awkwardness, whose forehead wrinkled in exhaustion, whose shoulders drooped even on days when the sun was out, the sky clear and children's laughter and the rustling of leaves lingered in the background.

i saw what i could be. 

i wrote the above on oct 4th 2004. 

have i become what i could have been?

there were moments, minutes, even hours when i became that stranger. 

that stranger no longer remains so. 

so often has she appeared in my life 

that the stranger now is no stranger 

than the setting sun.

and then there's you.

trying to get back to you but elusive you remain.

or am i not trying hard enough?

alongside you id like to be.

a whiff of you would suffice.

you whom ive yet to meet. 

my thoughts let me down.

for they are a constant reminder of what has yet to be. 

but then theres you.

without you, i continue to seek these temporary thoughts.